Men naturally have a propensity to turn to their partners for emotional support during difficult situations. At the beginning of a romance, especially, your new partner will seem like a refuge from the turmoil of your prior relationship. You’ll feel welcome and like you’ve finally met someone who gets you.
It might be difficult to distinguish between sharing in a way that builds closeness and attracts a person’s attention and dumping on them. To a degree, honesty is refreshing. You run the danger of another failed relationship if the focus of your talks shifts to what “she did” or “the lawyer said,” conveyed with the immediacy of breaking news.
Girlfriends Do Not Work As Therapists
Women could naturally be caregivers. She probably wants to hear about your previous relationship issues at first since they may wish to be helpful and loving companions. However, everyone has a saturation limit, and if you continue to talk about your ex’s transgressions and negative behaviours after months of dating, she will become weary of serving as your go-to therapist.
The Couple Turns Into A Trio
By constantly bringing up the ex, you set up a love triangle where your ex is somehow psychically inserted into the dynamics of your new relationship.
It Stimulates Comparisons
Naturally, your new girlfriend is interested in learning more about your ex, which is why you agreed to watch a series of repeats with her. She can’t listen to your combat stories without making comparisons and inferences about herself.
She secretly wants to discover which flaws in your ex’s personality you found annoying and which caused a rift in your relationship. Did she complain, act out, or lose her job? Those delicious details are fire for a lady who is struggling with self-doubt.
Oversharing Makes You Less Manly
Your girlfriend will no longer regard you as the victim of some money-hungry woman or psychopath, but rather as a man who struggles with expressing himself and setting boundaries if you’re still moaning about your ex’s wrongdoings months into the relationship.
She Will Inquire As To Your Suitability For the Dating
A man who brings about his previous relationship frequently is likely to be carrying around a lot of emotional baggage and harbouring feelings for the former. Even criticism of the ex-partner may be seen as a sign that “the woman doth complain too much.”
Negative Energy Breeds More Negativity
Dissing the ex makes you appear to be a man who has unresolved issues and is angry and resentful. She’ll also start to wonder what nasty things you’ll say about her after the relationship is finished.
One can only listen to the tale about the time your wife drank too much at the corporate Christmas party before they stop caring. The goal of dating is to enjoy yourself and experience the satisfaction of being with someone who accepts and loves you.
Visit the trendy new eatery in your town. Take advantage of a couple’s massage. Together, cuddle up on the couch and watch “House of Cards” nonstop. Just take a break from talking about the ex at this point.
Unfortunately, we are all aware that it may be hard to let go of an ex, especially when they have been a part of our life for a long period. It takes some time to adjust to their absence.
Thus, it causes your mind to wander to the past, which is why it’s not a good idea to bring up your ex on your first date. If you’re like me and highly emotional, it can be difficult to shake such thoughts and refocus your attention on the present.
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